My grandma lived in an era when the populace were mostly fresh from the chaotic conditions in China. Almost all suffered and tried to survive on their own. They possessed the value of thrift, courage, perseverance, integrity, interdependence, compassion, responsibility and wisdom. The sinkeh came to this strange new land of silatpor where the government support for them to get accustomed to the lives here was non-existent. They depended on their own ingenuities, connections and luck to survive. They joined mutual aids associations, clans as well as praying to gods and goddesses in the temples for comfort and and assurances in times of needs and sorrows.
Different dialects and clans devised their own social customs and rules for their members so as to maintain an ordered society. There were rules and customs for all individuals from birth till death. My grandma’s funeral looked complicated today but in those days, it was the norm.
The funeral rites of grandma was of the traditional type. It was expected as she was a devouted Buddhist and a member of many temples in Singapore. I remember the night when she passed away, I drove my Ford Cortina to Telok Ayer Ma Chu Kong Temple to inform the abbot there to inform them of her passing.
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The Telok Ayer Ma Chu Kong
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Just like any immigrants from Fukien Province, the first thing they did upon landing in Singapore was to pay homage to the Goddess Ma Chu for delivering a safe passage for them. Since that day when she visited Ma Chu Kong she had never failed to pay her subscription to Ma Chu Kong membership. Upon reaching Ma Chu Kong at around eight in the evening. It was dimly lit as at the time Ma Chu Kong had been granted as a monument for Preservation. I rapped hard on the huge imposing timber doors bearing the two door guards. Only faint sound could be heard although I had used a considerable amount of strength. Then a faint voice was heard. “Please come by the side door.” I went to the right. The side door was not locked. I pushed open and went to a counter. An elderly man attended to me and I told him about the passing of my grandma. He asked for my grandma’s detail at the same time taking out a huge register. He ran through it and found my grandma’s name. I updated my address and he told me to go home. They would follow up the next day.
As a member of Ma Chu Kong, my grandma was given free funeral rites recited by one of the monks there. After the recantation I drove the monk back to the temple.
My grandma was a member to several other temples in Singapore. She visited the one at Koon Seng – the Hiong Lian See most frequently. She had made several friends there and had even stayed for several weeks. During the wake several nuns from the temple came to chant the sutras and gave words of comfort to us. Other temples send condolence scrolls and pai jun.
As soon as Dr Lee Kim Hui pronounced my grandma’s passing, he got back to his clinic and wrote the death certificate and handed to me. Then with immediate effect, my father contacted the relatives and arrangement was made for the undertaker to come. First the body was washed and powdered and the dressed in a suit which was preserved by my mother for that day. At the same time, the diety of the house was covered with red paper. All mirrors were also covered. It was a taboo that if mirrors were not covered, death would be reflected and soon another death would occur. Cats and dogs were caged. It was a taboo as should a furry animal were to jump over a dead body, it would invite negative forces. Before lowering the dressed up body into the coffin, the priests would perform some rituals. We mourners had to heed what he said, The eldest son – Koon Seng died before her. So my father was to take his place. He was to recount how his mother when he and the siblings were young she looked them. When she was old to show their piety they looked after her until the end of the living journey on earth. A straw hat was then tossed onto the rooftop to signify her duty on earth had accomplished. Then the body was lowered and propped in alignment. The son (my father) was to verify that all was properly done before all other objects that she used was put into it. The coffin was placed in an enclosed tent with raised platform. Grandma’s kledang coffin was a huge one although her body was quite slim. There were three humps at the front and three humps at the back. Chinese coffin was built to simulate the Chinese character jin(gold). The Chinese word for coffin is kuan cai. Kuan means reaching official status and cai means wealth. In short it means in death she attains an official title and wealth. In front of the coffin was her photograph which my mother had prepared many years back.
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| The Golden Boy and Jade Girl effigies guarding her soul. |
There was a chair with her shirt on the back rest and a pair of pants on the seat. By the sides were effigies of Golden Boy and Jade Lady. Flanking the effigies were decorative steel plates from the various moral kong kuan or associations from which my relatives were members. One of which was the Seok Poh Sean Thng. At night they were brightly lit up. In front of her photo was a bowl of rice tipped to the top with a pair of chopsticks standing with the pointed tips down. There were fruits and her favourite drinks (black coffee) placed on the offering table in front. A joss stick container was there for people who came to pay their respect to place the joss sticks. Those who came to pay respect either lit up a single joss stick or bow three times while one of the mourners either knelt down by the side the altar or bow. Sometimes out of courtesy the person who came to pay respect would with both hands held the hands of the mourner and bade him to stand up and said a few comforting words. ![]() |
| The altar |
We had the options to hold the wake on odd days, as according to Toaist practices, odd days were meant for the dead. We chose 5 days. During the 5days we donned the traditional mourning clothes according to the colours of family hierarchy. My parents the ‘cheese’ cloth with topped ‘sack material’ with straw sandal. According to traditional that was to remind them of the hardship faced with the dead when she was alive. For us the grandchildren we had to wear the heavy blue outfit.
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| Choosing the correct colour of the outfit. |
The great grandchildren had to wear light green outfit. To denote that we were mourning we had to wear a little squarish cloth about 1.5 inch long on the left shoulder as she was a female. Few people came to pay respect in the day. On almost every night, the courtyard was packed. They were my grandma’s friends, colleagues of my parents, business acquaintances, relatives from both sides – maternal and paternal, kampong folks from both Tanah Merah Kechil and Chai Chee, friends and colleagues from relatives and others who had known her by sight. They came pay respect and donated pai jin spontaneously. Others sent scrolls and wreaths. As my grandma was subscribed to both the Buddhist and Toaist temples, on most nights there were Taoist priests and Buddhists nuns chanted their prayers.
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| The priests chanting that her journey to the western heaven be a safe one |
We mourners would mingle around or sit with the colleagues and friends and recount how the early lives of grandma and how she died. The people who came to pay respect should they were leaving, they left quietly. At the very most, they say a few comforting words. It was the customs of the Chinese that after paying respect to the dead, left without having to say goodbye to the host. Should the host know that anyone was leaving he should not wish them bye-bye or thank them or worst still to see them again. The elder explained that it was not proper thanking people paying respect to the dead. Why was it not proper? Well, we had to analyse it ourselves. ![]() |
| The offering was a major item in the funeral rite |
Throughout the four nights we kept awake taking turns to take short naps. There were young friends and relatives taking the opportunity to play card games or mahjong the whole night long. People who came to pay respect to grandma and expressed condolences dressed in somber coloured clothes. Brightly coloured clothes such as yellow, red and gold were avoided. After paying respect, they sat at prepared tables and we mourners joined them recounting the days we had with grandma when she was alive. On the tables were drinks, nuts and watermelon seeds. A wad of red thread was included. It was voluntary if they wanted to take a piece of red thread with them for good luck. Donation of pai jin was given and names and amount was recorded. At about 9.00 pm, night snack was served. Since grandma was a vegetarian, only vegetarian food was served.
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| The priest led the funeral rite |
On the final night, which the Hokkien called it thng sei hong there were ceremonies by the Buddhist nuns as well as the Toaist priests as my grandmother subscribed to both religions. To most Singaporeans there is a blur line dividing which is which. Both co-exist each other. That night the nuns from Heong Lian See Temple chanted the sutras while the mourners clasps their hands in obeisance.
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| Immediate female members of the family had to wear headgear of sackcloth.The joss paper on the floor was to distract wayward spirits not to harm grandma's soul journey to western heaven. |
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| Males mourners in their ceremonial outfits circling the wheel of rebirth |
The Toaist priests next performed the rites in sing song manner accompanied by bells and gongs. To a discerning ear he can make out what the priests were saying. Briefly he was describing grandma’s birth place and his journey to Singapore up to the present address. He also read out in order all his children (in-laws included), grandchildren and great grandchildren. (He had a list provided by my father.) After that we were led by the priests, followed by family members (in order of seniority) circuiting the coffin and altar reciting the Toaist scripture many rounds with intervals. A huge elaborate multi-tiered palatial house complete with a car and a chauffeur was then taken to a prepared empty ground to be burnt. Wine was poured around the paper house while it was burning. It was believed that the wine was to distract unwelcome spirits from looting the ‘house’.
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| This car with the sugar cane on the top known as the dragon spirit was to lead the procession |
The next day was the sendoff. Again there were many rounds of prayers. While going round the hearse, joss paper was consciously dropped on the ground. It was a source of distraction. It was believed that evil spirits would be busily picking up the joss money instead of disturbing grandma’s journey to the nether world. The family members, followed by relatives, friends and colleagues and neighbours, bowed and knelt to pay their last respect. If there was a big group, the conductor would get the members to stand in an orderly manner and he would command, “Yi Chi Kong!” All would bow. “Zai Chi Kong!” All would bow the second time and ‘San Chi Kong!” All would do the final bow. Relatives were given gifts of offerings to bring home. ![]() |
| The Seok Poh Sean Thng Association |
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| The mourners in traditional outfits
and the hearse |
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| Friends and relatives pulled the ropes from the hearse. The ropes represent the dragon whiskers. |
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The Chinese funeral band from a Mutual Aid Assosication
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Moral Society Home members were entitled a band to play for the deceased. My cousin, Hong Huat, was a member so the band from Seok Poh Sean Thng came. With so many gongs beating at the same time, the decibel of sound must be very high. It made our hearts shook. When the band stopped, our ears were still ringing.
Those who came to send the deceased off were given a towel, a short strand of red thread and a small red packet for good luck. Finally the coffin cover was closed and nailed. When nailing the coffin, all eyes were told to avoid looking at it.
Then pallbearers carried the coffin up the hearse. The hearse was very well decorated with colourful scenery of mountains, valleys and rivers. On the top of the hearse there was a figure of a crane. It indicates that the deceased was a lady.
As grandma had lived to a ripe old age with many children and grandchildren as well as great grandchildren, she was considered as a lady who lived life up to the fullest. A special car called the leng cheng jia was prepared. The passenger of this car had to be a man of honour . That man happened to be Uncle Yam. This car was decorated with a red scroll tied onto two fresh fully grown sugar plants on the roof. The sugar cane signified that it was the savior of the Hokkien tribe. A legend was told that a group of maurauding pirates plundered and terrorised the Hokkien people. All were killed except a couple who hid among a groove of sugar cane.
There was a band that played the western music too. Only a deceased who had a son-in-law was entitled to a western band. Chew Hock Seng was the son-in-law and he hired the western band.
Two long ropes were tied in front of the hearse. These were to represent the whiskers of the dragon. Mourners who came held the rope as if pulling it. The hearse then moved forward. Others followed behind the hearse. Some looked after those who were too grieved to walk.
Grandma’s body was to be cremated at Bright Hill Crematorium. That morning, the procession was long indeed. The first to move was the leng cheng jia. Next was the Chinese band. After that the western band. Then the hearse. The first in line to follow the hearse was the sons and daughters, then followed by the grandchildren and so on. The rest were relatives, friends and kampong folks. After a group photo was taken, we proceeded. With two bands playing at the same followed by the engines of the lorries and cars, the din made many in the kampong stared in awe. When we reached the bitumen road at Pin Ghee High School, we boarded the buses to Bright Hill Crematorium.
At Bright Hill Crematorium, another round of prayers was said. This time it was conducted by the monks of the temple. After the prayer, the coffin was heaved onto a pile of firewood. Fire was then started. We were told to collect the remains the next day. In the meantime my father carried the photo of my grandma home to be worshipped for 49 days. The next day, after the remains were collected, it was temporarily put under the charge of the temple. As she was a staunch member of the temple when she was alive, she was entitled to a columbarium for members away from the others.
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The Bright Hill Columbarium
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| Her ashes are contained in the urn |
After 49 days of daily prayers to her image, a ceremony was held. She then joined the rank of ancestor. She had a tablet of her own. Her tablet was placed in Heong Lian See temple. Every year we would get together to attend her death anniversary.
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